Wednesday, March 17, 2010

You Like It When I Do This, Right?

Seems like when I've posted transcripts of my stupid game notes, you gentle readers either enjoy it or at least don't try to burn my house down over it.

Well, I was just cleaning out my desk drawer at work ('cause I changed desks, not jobs) and I found some sheets of paper with stupid game notes on 'em. So I figure -- eh, why not post 'em on my blog?

After all, you don't know where I live.


1. What type aliens?
  • Grey
  • Bug-eyed monster √√
  • Giger
  • Gooey/Blobs
  • Martians (H.G. Wells') √
  • Predator
  • Big-Headed, Wise, Benevolent
  • Nords/Movellans
2. What do they want?
  • Gold!
  • Women!
  • Cattle!
  • Blood!
  • Souls!
  • Plutonium!
  • Slaves!
  • Candy!
  • Booze!
3. What are the BEM's vulnerabilities?
  • Water
  • Cactus juice
  • Whiskey
  • Castor Oil
  • Horse poop
  • Hay
  • Iron
  • Milk
  • NOTHING! You just need bigger guns! (Civil War cannon? Gatling gun? Dynamite?)


3 NPCs
  1. Randolph The Robot Reindeer: A mechanical reindeer who can shoot lasers from his bright red nose. Laser-Firing Mecha-Reindeer (5)
  2. El Keeblero: Zorro, if he were and Elf.
  3. Esther Bunny: A panicky female rabbit in a flowered dress and a big, goofy hat. She keeps dying and coming back.
  1. The Island of Misfit Boys: Elf gay bar.
  2. Warehouse Alpha-9: An off-season storage facility. In-season, it's busy for a long time -- until around 12/23, when it's totally empty with the exception of a guy sweeping up.
  3. The Golden Nugget: A hotel/casino owned & operated by Yukon Cornelius. Rumors of a backstage operation dealing in sketchy hi-tech R&D have yet to be proven.

-Who's there that the PCs would want to punch in the face?

A: Scorizo, the Grumpy Elf: A crooked, deceitful elf who fancies himself a mastermind. He wants the North Pole and Christmas all to himself, and getting it means taking Santa Claus out of the picture. Since he's a schemer, though, he doesn't want to get his hands dirty.

Scorizo (like "chorizo"*) is a two-faced bastard through and through. He's really nice to your face, but he hates you behind your back.

Elf with Connections (4), Total Smarmy Bastard (3), Liar (3)

*Contrary to what Food Network hosts say, it's pronounced chore-EE-so, not chore-EATS-so. Don't say it that way, it makes you sound pretentious and stupid.